A few days ago I decided to take a break from all social media - Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr, Goggle Plus, Periscope, MySpace, Tindr, Jack'd, Grindr, Pinterest, LinkedIn, youtube, and all forms of group chats that didn't include my actual phone number.
What was I left with? Technically, a useless 179 dollar bill form sprint! Literally my phone hasn't been touched unless of course I'm not near my Mac book to respond to emails. Or the occasional bill collector or my mother calling to ask "what are you doing" ... talk about either seriously depressing or just plain sad, either way - this break has and will continue to show me all of my meaningful relationships.
So, the point of me stepping away from social media was a simple moment ; I was Turing over to snooze my alarm .. on my phone... only to then open my phone to check Instagram - it gets worst. I then head over to check Facebook and then send out a good morning tweet and record myself not wanting to wake ... once all that's been done, I roll over ... only to have my alarm sound once more!! I wasted a 15 minute intermission staying awake instead of actually either resting or getting my ass up and ready for work.
But of course I found myself reaching for my phone throughout the rest of the day - it was becoming extremely clear that at 29 I really am addicted to social media - not my phone ... SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!
See, I could totally accept when my parents were like, "This child is literally glued to his phone" or "You can't live without that thing" - these were acceptable assumptions. Not social media - the one thing that is clearly structured around vanity, lack of privacy and well , just a hub of insecure people looking for validation in some form or another ( in my opinion ) ... none the less, with that being said. My love or addiction (depends who's listening) for social media has to washed out out - I need to enjoy social media ... not need it .... you can tell by that statement theres a deeper purpose here, and eventually I'll cover that... Just not now.
This break comes at a time when I'm reevaluating my life and choices that I've made, during a time where I feel like I'm once again having to figure out what am I exactly doing; all this after I thought I'd figured it out.
If you're anything like me, you find have or will eventually find yourself being consumed by your phone, checking for the response to the DM or waiting for the comments, or counting the likes, or just sniping away until it finally hits you, you've got no work done, you have find yourself worrying about peoples opinions, or even lack thereof. Either way, its not the end of the world if you distance your reach or others reach of you. Thats my point, I want to regain my life back, regain my confidence back, I at one point simply produced poetry, or wrote essays just because , or vlogged about things that mattered to me without ever thinking about what people said or how many people read or watched. I want that kind of motivation back - the motivation to be free in my expression.
Over the next few days, its my goal to get more work done, bridge more partnerships between myself and actual human interaction, and just be peaceful within myself. At the end of this, I hope to share with you all a little more and hopefully a better version of myself.
Till then, I pray you all have a blessed day/evening!